Gushati

June 28th

June 26, 2012

Kinyarwanda lessons have been going great. An amazing thing happened to me the other day. I was walking to the clinic, like usual children were screaming at me. For the first time since I have been here I actually understood what they were saying. They were screaming “white person how are you, can we have your plastic water bottle?”  Or course I didn’t understand it right away but I knew I recognized all the words, finally I figured out what they were saying. This was a big moment for me.

Lessons with Amaharo are continuing. He is really a great guy. Every day I learn a little more about him, sometimes more than I want to know. He continues to talk about the genocide. I have now come to find out he was 15 years old when his father was killed. To revenge his father’s death, at 15 he went out with a gun to find his father’s killers. As a result he ended up being shot several times in leg.  I don’t know what happened after that but I can’t even imagine what it was like.  I know I have said this several times but this country continues to amazing me with its ability to rise from its past to make a new future. I have asked several people how they are able to just move on, I don’t understand how you can live with neighbors knowing they have killed your family. People always respond about the same way, they say “it affected every single Rwandan, if we don’t move on together, then we will all die slowly.” Well put.  

Although Prime Minister Kagame has several critics, I can say a very positive thing he has done for Rwanda is how he focuses on the building a bright future. EVERYWHERE in Rwanda there are signs that say “Remember our past to build a bright future, maybe that’s why their mentality is so universal.

June 27^th

One of the orphans was hit by a car on Monday. Ugg. She broke her clavicle and has a concussion. I went to go see her at the Gisyni hospital to make sure she was being treated as a serious patient, not an orphan. She is doing a lot better but because of the language barrier I’m still trying to understand what’s going on. Keep her in your thoughts please.

On a happier note I have a funny story from last weekend. So unless you are going to the bar or out to dinner there is not a lot to do around Kigali or Gisyeni during the evenings. So one night Julien and Manjo played a very intense game of chess.  This wasn’t a normal game of chess, there were bets at stake. If Julien won Manjo would have to meditate at the busiest bus station in Kigali for 5 minutes in mid-day, and if Manjo won Julien would have to do pushup in the middle on the bus station. Bets placed and both sides wanting to win Manjo was the victor. The next day when it was the busiest (easily over 300 people waiting for several busses) Julien walked to the center of the bus station and starting doing pushups. As if people staring weren’t funny enough, a man came up next to him and starting doing pushups along with Julien. Not about to be shown up by some American the man was screaming “oya” (no) at Julien and starting doing one handed pushups. The other volunteers and I were dying. Probably the best thing I have seen since I have been here. I will try to post the video soon.

June 28^th

Yesterday I spent my time at the clinic, no babies, but there was a little bit of excitement in maternity. Angel was not there so I don’t understand completely what had happened, but from what I understand the mother was having difficulty with her labor, something my clinic was not prepared for. The nurse called an ambulance so they could take the mom to Gisneyi hospital. Gisneyi hospital is about 10-15 miles away from my clinic; response time for the ambulance was 2 hours, I could have probably walked faster. I don’t know what ended up happening, but, I do know I would never want to get seriously ill here.  

The remaindered of the day I took blood for the HIV tests and then went to the lab and performed each HIV test. Usually I don’t spend much time in the lab, but I think it’s pretty cool I am now able to take blood from my patients, run the HIV test myself, and then tell them in they are positive or negative, I’m like a one man show.

I feel as if I have not been spending as much time as the orphanage as I wish I could, so, this past week I have gone just about every day. Yesterday I opened up the library so I could have an arts and craft day. I was hesitant at first because it’s hard to keep on track of all the children when it’s only one person. They all fight for your attention, beat each other, and often steal books and pencils out of the library. I decided to do it anyway because if a volunteer doesn’t open up the library no one does. I decided to take on the task of water painting. I thought it was going to be a disaster, how could I possibly paint with children who beat each other with sticks. To my surprise once I got the paint out it there was a total transformation in their behavior. So engrossed in their art they didn’t even notice each other. They LOVED it, and all of them loved showing off their paintings. They were all very eager to show me their pictures, I told them they were beautiful, they all smiled at my approval. I have a feeling this is the first time most of them have ever used a paint set. Because they can’t keep their pictures and I can’t come home with them all, I decided to hang them up around the library.  Who knew art would be such a great outlet for these kids.

Today I didn’t go to the clinic I decided to spend my day at the orphanage. After yesterday I was really inspired to do more art. Today I opened the library and they did several paintings and drawings. They love it and love art as well, so it works. When I first started at the orphanage I didn’t think they had art supplies or books, since I have been here I have come to find out there is a locked room that has everything you could possibly think of.  The issue is no one takes the time to unlock the door and organize a time for the children to use this stuff, depressing! My question is what good is this stuff if it’s not used, someone needs to take the initiative and open up the library.  

Today I also spent time in the orphanage clinic. I have taken on a project now in light of some recent things I have seen with the children’s health. Several of the kids have ringworm, scabies, HIV, and the list goes on. The other day a little girl had this horrific rash on her neck that was so irritated it was bleeding. I told the mamas that this child needs to see a nurse and do something about this. Not fazed by my comment I made it very clear that this kid needs to see a nurse now!  I took her over the clinic where I handed her over to one of the nurses; the nurse looked at me and basically said what do you want me to do about this. Infuriated I thought you tell me, you are the nurse? What the issue was is the nurse didn’t know what the rash was or what to put on it. I ended up going through the medication and found some cream. Her rash looks a million times better, but, because of this incident I am going to go through the clinic and label every medication and its purpose, this way hopefully there is no excuse as to why these kids are not treated properly. Today was day one of this adventure.

As the days go by I am seriously getting attached to these children. I know I need to come back here and try to do something more meaningful for them. The Point Foundation is really involved in this particular orphanage and is constantly employing people to come here to make sure their money is being spent the way it was intended. I know they are looking to employee someone to live here for the next several months. Bad timing now, but, after school you never know. I have several great contacts and I love these kids. I am trying to feel out how Matt’s sponsorship goes, that is also an option for the future.

Like I said I am getting attached to all of them, but I know there are a few I’m going to cry with once I leave. Carmen a 10 month old girl, Justin a 14 year old boy, Wemana a 11 year old girl(HIV Positive), and Gushati a 3 year old boy. Gushati I might take in my bag with me, you think I’m kidding but I’m not. If international adoption was allowed I would try to make Gashati mine next year. Gashati is so sweet, so cute, and he has 6 toes… certainly special. I hug him, carry him around, and play with him. Today when I left he cried. Ahhh I’m not wishing my life away but I do wish I was in the right financial and emotional place in my life to adopt him, anyone want a 3 year old boy?

June 26th pic

June 26th

June 20th

English and Kinyarwanda lessons are going amazing. I was afraid I was going to be lonely here without the other volunteers, even though there are so many people around I couldn’t (still really can’t) communicate with any of them.  Amahro is much better at English than I am at Kinyarwanda, but, he is in no way fluent. In a way its total submersion. I wish I would have done this sooner; it’s amazing what you can learn about someone when you try to connect with them by speaking their language. Up until recently all I knew about Amaharo was he worked for FVA, and had a pet chicken (who I’m still plotting against). Through these lessons my vocabulary has become more extensive and Amaharo has begun to really open up. I have learned Amaharo is 33 years old, comes from a local village in Gisnysi, he has two brothers and two sisters.  One day he was teaching me how to ask about someone’s family. Practicing, I asked him about his family. Through this lesson he told me he lived in Gisnysi during the genocide (btw its really taboo to talk about that here), he told me Gisnysi was one of the worst places in Rwanda during the genocide, finally he then told me his father fled Rwanda in 1994 and went to the DRC. Not having the vocabulary to push the topic and not really sure what is ok to discuss I didn’t ask any questions. He then continued and told me “they” burned his house, stole his cows, and beat his mother. Next he told me his dad was dead. Still not forcing the subject he told me when his father came back to Rwanda in 1996, the genocide was over but the people who had fled where hunted and killed. Wow, that was a really heavy Language class, what do you say to someone when they tell you that? It’s really taboo go discuss the genocide, but Amaharo seemed like he wanted to. For now I have decided to never bring up the topic, just be willing to listen.

June 21

Thursday was another busy day. I tried to find out some more information about sponsoring children for Matt, and I delivered another baby, this time a boy weighting in at 3kg. This makes it three deliveries now. Each one seems to be getting a little more complicated. This time the mom was in a lot of pain and it took forever to get the baby out… several pushes. Also the baby was born with six figures. Surprisingly I have seen this several times here. I have no clue why, the only thing I can really think of is people tend to marry within their village, so maybe small gene pool if they keep reproducing with each other, just speculation. 

Later that day I finally learned how to test someone blood for HIV. I understood the clinical side of how to take blood but I never understood how it was actually tested. Even though I don’t really enjoy lab work I’m really excited I got the opportunity to learn what they do with the blood once I take it.   There is a lot that goes into diagnosing someone with HIV, and to be the best nurse I feel I should understand all of it. It’s pretty similar to a Ph test. All you need is a drop of blood on the provided strip. One line means negative, two lines mean positive.

Also with my growing Kinyarwanda vocabulary I have noticed the nurse at the clinic seem to like me a lot more.  Still I have no clue what they are saying but I have noticed they are trying to learn a little English. Angel told me they think since I am trying to learn Kinyarwanda they feel they should learn English. You never know, I might try to teach them some English when I have some free time.

June 21 night

Oh my god, I seriously love Angel. I might have met my match when it comes to being blunt. She has no filter when it comes to her body language or the words coming out of her mouth. I love it when people tell you what they are thinking and she does exactly that, she called me deaf the other day because I don’t speak her language. I will show her, I am determined to learn. Today she also commented on my skin and hair. She asked me why my hair was “black” at the top and “white” and the bottom. I had to explain to her it’s because I highlighted it, and, it has grown out. She told me she liked it a lot, but she still didn’t understand why my hair is so dark like hers. She then asked about my skin, she told me it’s not white like the other volunteers. I had to explain to her my mother has darker skin. She then asked me if my mother was black, I guess she put the dark hair and dark skin together and assumed I was biracial. I laughed so hard when she said this; I asked her why in the world she would think that. Angel responded because “you are brown”. She then told me my skin is very pretty. Ha ha, I guess I no longer fit in, I’m not white like the volunteers, and I’m not black like the locals.

June 22

Took several peoples blood today. It’s great but life is getting redundant. Today we had one person test positive, seriously this is the WORST part of working at the clinic. I hate telling people they have HIV. Every day I walk into clinical, look at the faces staring at me and I wonder which person will I be telling within the next few hours about their positive HIV results.  Today it was a lady 25 years old, I honestly have no clue how she got it, but with young unmarried women I’m always fearful it’s result of sexual violence or prostitution. She was devastated and so was I.

On a positive note I finally discovered the clinic does give out free condoms. I also discovered at the nicer supermarkets you can find condoms as well, I still have not been able to find them at supermarkets in poorer areas. At least condoms are available if you look for them.

June 25, 2012

My weekend was amazing! Thursday night I took a bus to Kigali. This was the first time I have traveled by myself for a long distance. I am actually impressed with myself, I was able to find the right bus to Kigali, get their safely, and once there flag down a motor bike, negotiate the price, and then direct my driver to the guest house. I know it doesn’t sound that hard but try the added element of being alone, not speaking the same language and my lack of direction. Once I got there the other volunteers were waiting for me to go out to the club. We ended up going to one of the biggest clubs in town, Thursday nights are Raga night here. It would have been pretty fun if the power didn’t go out within ten minutes of getting there. No generator for back up, the club was completely dark. Rolling with it we decided to leave and bar hop around Kigali. We even found a karaoke bar… my favorite, too bad it was full of a bunch of Beyonces, no way am I getting up there to sing now! Regardless I had a blast.

The next morning Charlotte and I tried to get up early to plan our weekend, that failed terribly. For the last week we had been talking about going to Nyungwe National Park. We made reservations with a hotel but we still didn’t have way to get there. Not too keen on renting a car (bc of my last experience) and having no idea if a bus would take us that far finally we decided maybe we should go into town to find the bus schedule. We found a bus and it would be leaving in a few hours, even better they said they would drop us off at the hotel. Later that day four of us pack up and took a five hour bus ride to Nyugwe National Park. It was a beautiful drive through southern Rwandan, complete Rainforest. Once again I saw a huge refugee camp, I honestly had no idea they sent refugees that south. Because it was such a long bus ride we ended up driving in the dark. Looking out the window I was able to see the stars for the first time and they were BEAUTIFUL.  Then our bus came to a halt, middle of the Rainforest, in the pitch black, our driver said we were here and open the door. Confused I asked are you sure this is the hotel, he said yes so we all got off. Pitch black and no idea where we were, we walked down an unpaved road into the forest. Once again freaked out, I went over every possible scenario of how I could die. We kept walking until we found someone at end of the road. It was the security man from the hotel… thank god. Apparently the power had gone out so that describes the total darkness. He directed us toward our rooms and then the power came back. Once I could see, I realized I was at a very quaint hotel in the middle of the rainforest, INCREDIBLE!!!! It even had running warm water. So excited I hopped in the shower, lathered my body and hair with soap, and when I was about to be clean for the first time in 4 weeks the water turned off. Pissed I looked up at the drain and the knobs thinking I had somehow turned it off. Nope, I guess the water just shuts off whenever it wants to. Next came the string of four letter words, I tried to rinse my hair with a water bottle, but, I ended up sleeping with soap in my hair.

The next morning we all got up and found our way to the Rangers station. There we decided we would do the Canopy tour and the Waterfall hike. First the Canopy tour (this time we decided in favor of a guide).  The Canopy Tour was a 2 hour vigorous hike into the heart of the Rainforest. Good thing I’m somewhat is shape because if not I would have died. Straight up and down, over rocks, in the mud, through the forest we made it to the 2km long canopy suspended 100 meters above the forest floor. If you are afraid of heights this is defiantly not for you. We were at the top of the trees looking down on all the vegetation and wildlife, stunning. All you could see for miles was green forest, talk about in the middle of nowhere. Walking back across the canopy my guide pointed out there was a viper hanging on a limb above my head… Screw that, I ran across that canopy so fast.

After the canopy and the near death experience with the viper we headed for the Waterfall. The waterfall hike was 5 hours. Not as vigorous but a difficult hike. You really got to be an outdoors person to enjoy Rwanda to its fullest. We continued to hike deeper into the rainforest until finally we arrived. Seriously the waterfall looked like a scene out of Tarzan or King Kong, absolutely perfect. As we got closer you could feel the mist from the waterfall. Our now 5 hour hike was worth it. I tried to take it all in but the beauty was almost surreal. I looked up and all that I could see was trees, trees, and more trees.  After enjoying the waterfall we now had a 3 hour hike back to the ranger station. As we stared back it began to thunder, it looked as if any minute it would rain. I thought it was cool, we would be able to experience the rain in the rainforest. My friends didn’t think the same, oh well it’s not my fault they didn’t bring a raincoat.  The rain held up until about the last hour of the hike. We made it back safe and just in time for dinner. This trip was going off flawlessly.

That night charlotte and Julian stole the first shower from me. It was freezing cold, ha ha serves them right. That night, right before bed I turned on the shower in hopes that by some chance warm water would come out. To my surprise it was more than warm, it was burning HOT!!! Sooooooooo excited I took my first hot shower since I have been here. The pressure sucked but still it was hot! So happy I bragged to Julian, charlotte, and Gabby about my amazing shower. They told me F off… ha ha, sucks to suck.

June 19th

June 18, 2012

It’s so weird now that Jane and I are the only volunteers in the house. Angel and Amahoro are around but Angel is more of a coordinator and Amahoro doesn’t speak much English. Even though Amahoro’s English is not so great I still really like him. He is always there to let me in the house, cook my meals, and do my laundry. I tried to help him with the dishes once but he would not let me, I know he is paid but I really appreciate it. Although I love him to death there are a few things I could go without, first he could let me do the dishes once in a while, second I wish we could find a better place to hang my drying clothes, I come home and I see my underwear hanging across the bushes, and third his pet chicken Machovilie. The stupid bird starts squawking every morning precisely at 4am. Half joking I told him I was going to kill it if it didn’t shut up. He must have thought I was asking where she was because he replied she was sleeping. As if one chicken isn’t bad enough Machovilie now has a boyfriend, I have no clue where this rooster came from but it’s now following Machovilie around the yard. Amahoro is really eager to learn English so I think while I am here I’m going to try to help him out, in return I want to learn a little more Kinyarwanda, I’m actually amazed with how much I’m able to pick up, imagine if I actually tried.

Today I spent my day at the clinic. No babies… I’m dying to get another delivery. Even though there were not any deliveries I actually had a really busy day. Several people came in for prenatal exams and several for HIV testing. Today we performed 30 HIV tests, all came back negative, and I would say that was a successful day. One of the coolest things about working at the clinic is the teaching I get to do. Not that I’m and expert on HIV but you would be surprised how little some people know. I usually discuss what HIV is, how you get it, and ways to avoid getting it. Doing the teaching is actually pretty fulfilling, hopefully these patients will be able to carry this information into the future and avoid contracting HIV or even educate others on HIV prevention. The government also seems to be taking an active role on HIV prevention. You can’t walk down the street without seeing signs about safe sex and using condoms. Although the government is strongly encouraging safe sex I do wonder if this is really put into practice since a majority of the country is Catholic. From what I understand traditional Catholics don’t seem so keen on birth control, including condoms. I wonder if their religious morals influence whether or not they are willing use condoms in a country stricken with HIV? Next time I go to the supermarket I am going to see if people even have access, how easy is it to be safe here? The government certainly supports it, but do the peoples moral interfere with the willingness to provide.

June 19, 2012

Today was another busy day. Since I have been here I have only had 4 patients come back positive for HIV, today I had 11. This is so emotionally draining because it shows what an epidemic HIV is in Africa. I don’t know each individuals story but I know some of them probably couldn't help contracting it. Today I also took blood from my first child. He was two and being tested for HIV. Like any child he was not happy about the needle but I got him on the first stick. I was really happy because he had such tiny veins and I know he wouldn’t let me stick him more than once. Thankfully he came back negative but still the situation was heart wrenching.  

I also delivered another baby today, this time it was a little girl weighting in at 3.5kg. She was healthy but the delivery was a lot more dramatic than the other one. The mom was crying (rightfully so), her mother was in the room pacing saying prayers, and it took a lot longer. But still the mother did great and the baby came out healthy. During the delivery I felt the Mother’s crying was justify, I imagine it’s extremely painful, but I guess one of the nurses didn’t think so, she came in the room right in mid push and slapped her across the legs. She proceeded out of the room but not before she screamed at her. I guess in America you are trained to be a little more sensitive than that.

This time I spent a lot more time with the baby after the birth. It took several minutes for the mother to deliver the placenta so I spent my time with the baby tying its cord, cleaning her up, and checking her lung sounds. When I left for the day baby and mom where doing great.

Noel Orphanage video

Donations are still being collected. Watch this video and see the children you will be helping.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=40qNtBSU-GI&feature=youtu.be

June 17th pic

June 17th

The last few days have been pretty much the same. No more babies though. My days are as follows, 9am till 2pm at the clinic, then I go over the orphanage for a couple hours to hang out with the kiddos. I have perfected taking blood, the last few days I have managed to get every patient on the first stick, this is a success! No vein scares me now! Because HIV is so prevalent in Africa every patient that comes in gets a blood test, meaning a lot of practice for me. Since I have been here I have not had one patient test positive for HIV, until Wednesday. Wednesday we had 4 people test positive for HIV. Two couples, both women were pregnant. In the U.S. HIV is such a tragic and life changing thing, therefor I expected both couples to be devastated. The reaction couldn’t have been more opposite, It might have been the language barrier but neither reacted the way I had expected. I still don’t understand, were they calm because it’s expected/accepted to have HIV in Africa or do they not understand the negative consequences of living with HIV.

Thursday I performed my first pelvic exam. A lady came in 7 months pregnant thinking she was in labor. Thankfully she wasn’t because that could have ended badly. It’s very common for preterm babies to die here. Turns out she was not dilated and was ok to go. If she had been 9 months pregnant though I would have been ready! I can’t wait for my next baby.

I have also perfected all types of public transportation. This includes bus, taxi, and motor bike (Kiana I know you would be proud, imagine me on the back of a bike).  I can even flag my own bus and I know when people are trying to rip me off, I’m practically a local, just kidding.  I did make a lethal mistake the other day though. The busses here are more like 12 seater vans that cram as many people in as they can. One time we had 26 heart beats, 21 adults, 4 babies and one chicken.  Anyway back to my mistake, there is a drive and one person who sits in the back whose job is to collect money, open the door when it stops, and hang his head out the window screaming at people if they want to get on.  So he is the one who opens and closes the door, no one else. Well I thought people wanted to get on. I tried to open the door to let them on but his head was hanging out the van window so I practically decapitated him against the sliding van door, ops. I felt like a complete idiot. It’s ok though because I know I ask for it while I’m in the bus. I also did another stupid thing the other day while I was on the bus. Constantly people are screaming from the street or moving vehicles “mazungoo” when they see me. On my way to the clinic I was riding the bus and we had stop, when we stop I saw one of my friends on the street. Not thinking whose company I was in, surrounded by all Africans I pointed, and screamed mazungoo out the window at her. I thought she would see me and think it was funny, instead everyone on the bus thought I was insane, they were probably thinking why is this mazungoo screaming mazungoo at the other mazugoo. They eventually all laughed.

Anyway till next time, but before I leave I just wanted to tell everyone that has donated so far THANK YOU, even the littlest things go so far here. I have a video that I will be posting soon on my facebook and blog of the children you are helping. Also, if you still want to donate I will be here till the end of July, so please do!!! You can send anything you want to my family at 11155 Pond Fountain Ct New Market MD 21774. Just give them a call at 301 882 7195. Also the organization is GVN, it’s a volunteer network so ever donation is a tax deductible, if you have more question about that call my parents, they are the tax people.

June 16, 2012

Friday Matt and Nicholes left and I was so sad to see them leave! They were so much fun. Watching them leave was probably one of the most emotional days I have had since I have been here. They were only here two weeks but they became so attached to the children, and the children became very attached to them. Matt become so attached that he actually looked into adoption. Interesting things are happening in Rwanda right now in terms of adoption and orphanages, internationals adoption is banned. Only Rwandans can adopt Rwandan children, and the president has a plan to close all orphanages by the year 2014. Since the genocide Rwandans have taken much pride in their country and really make it a point to bring back/keep Rwandans in their own country. The idea is together they will stay and make Rwanda strong.  Needless to say there is no way Matt could adopt, but there is a loophole. Matt obviously really attached and wanting to make a difference in these children’s lives decided to sponsor them. With the help of Angel, the orphanage, and a boarding school, Lillian and Emanuel are going to be sent to boarding school where they can get a proper education, be fed, and looked after until they graduate secondary school. The cost to send both children to school for one year is about two thousand U.S. dollars, amazing right. Matt is giving these two children a chance to be something more than just a product of an orphanage. After he worked out the logistics with the orphanage is when he told the children. Watching Matt tell Emanuel and Lillian was one of the most moving things I have every experienced, even better than delivering the baby. Even though these children are eleven and sixteen they realized what an amazing opportunity they were just given and cried, I have to admit I cried too. So happy they thanked Matt, then Matt told them the only thing they need to do to repay him is when they grow up they need to help children just like them, at this point I was bawling. Will this message stay with these children… hopefully, this situation kind of reminds me of the movie Pay it Forward. What a great methodology to live your life by. These two lucky children now have a chance.  

June 17, 2012

Because Matt and Nicholes left it’s just Jane and I now, since Miriam decided to go home. Hopefully I can stay busy during the week till I see the other volunteers on weekends. I know with everyone gone I’m going to be itching for the weekends. This past weekend was great; three volunteers came down to Gysini to visit me. Together we went to three of the local bars. My favorite was Bikini Tam Tam, Bikini Tam Tam is right on the beach, its so beautiful you almost forget about all the pollution. The bar is right on the water, and there are several tables and benches in the sand. Saturday we sat on the beach all day until we decided to find another bar at night… it was so much fun, finally social volunteers that are my age, too bad they are in Kigial during the week.   

Sunday we went to the border out of curiosity. We asked several people what it would take to cross the border of Rwanda to the DRC.  No one could give us a straight answer; I don’t even think they know. Several people have told us the DRC makes it pretty expensive for people to enter the country since they lack tourism, I guess you need to make your money somewhere. Most people are trying to get out of the DRC not go into it. There at the border we met several UN officials from Uruguay so we went up to ask them about it. They didn’t speak English but they spoke Spanish, for the first since I have been here I actually felt like I could communicate with someone. Although my Spanish sucks we were able to figure out the cost to get into the DRC. Half English half Spanish I was able to have a conversation with them about getting across the border, the cost and the DRC’s problems. That was really interesting to talk to the UN officials, it puts it into perspective where you are and your relation to other countries. As we were exploring we saw several refugees crossing the border of the Congo getting into refugee trucks to be taken to the refugee camp down the street from where I am living.  I would have taken a picture because it was quite interesting but I thought it would be a little insensitive.

The remained of the day Charlotte and I went to the market and then got our nails done, hard life! In the morning we watch the refugees escaping from the Congo and in the afternoon we get out nails done. To get a French manicure it cost 1500 frans, 2.5 US dollars. I’m looking pretty grimy so it was much needed.

Also since I have been feeling better I have been trying to get in touch with my inner Rwandan, so I started running. Angel always tells me I look smart before I go on run, which I find so funny. Running is in no way a hobby for people here, in fact they have no idea why I run. I guess when you walk half a day to get bananas I wouldn’t be able to justify it either. People find it so amusing that they will take pictures of me, run with me, or cheer me on while I run down the street. Gotta love Africa.

Akagera National Park Video

http://www.youtube.com/embed/rrB3OhTm684

Baby pic June 12th

Baby June 12th

June 12, 2012

Today was an amazing today. It started out pretty normal, I woke up around 7am, debated on taking a freezing cold shower, dragged myself to breakfast (after deciding against the shower), and then traveled to the clinic via bus and foot. Once at the clinic I took several pregnant women’s blood pressure and preformed a few prenatal checkups. Then it got interesting!!!! A nurse came into my room saying a woman just came into the clinic in labor. Immediately I ran over the maternity ward not wanting to miss a second. I arrived expecting to see a women screaming in pain, nope, she was sitting there very calm almost as if she was waiting for me… and she was. Angle, a nurse, and myself were all in the delivery room. The nurse asked me if this was my first birth. What she meant by this was is this my first delivery, and yes it was, this stuff DOES NOT happen back in the U.S. With Angle as my translation and the nurse as my direction I got ready for delivery. They tied a gown around me (as if I was a doctor) and I double gloved. First step get the lady in the stirrups. Taking it like a champ and without meds she laid there as I examined here and broke her water. I mean this with the most compassion possible but breaking her water was pretty gross. Not going back she was ready to have a baby, and I was there to deliver it, oh god! I had a brief moment where I was like there is no way I can do this. That feeling quickly disappeared when I realized I was the only one there to help her. I stood at the foot of the bed and with each contraction instructed her to push down and out. A lot of graphic/bloody stuff happened, but for the sake of her privacy I will not share, but she was amazing. Within 10 minutes of starting to push, the baby came out. First the head (with a full head of hair), then the nurse instructed me to grab it by head and pull. I was trying to be gentle but the nurse yelled at me, I guess there is no room for being gentle when you are trying to get a baby out. I basically wrestled that kid out of there until I was able to clap the cord and pull the rest of it out. Once the baby came out I cut the cord and put the baby on his moms belly. I know she must have been in pain but she just smiled looking at her new baby boy. The baby stopped crying once he heard his mom, how sweet.

In the heat of the moment I was not thinking about what was happening, but once I took the baby back from the mom is when I realized how amazing this experience was. I would have cried if it were not for Angle standing at the head of the bed in disgust, hands over her mouth, saying how she was never going to have a baby. In all honestly though I have never been so proud and amazed at myself or life. I had just witnessed a miracle, and I had brought that miracle into the world.

After the mom delivered the placenta and I got her clean up, she got herself out of the stirrups and walked into the next room. Amazing right, she makes women in the U.S. look pathetic. I followed her with the baby and as she settled down I handed her, her little boy. All the other new mothers swarmed her and myself. I knew they were talking about me, but for the first time I felt like they were saying something good… not the usual, stupid mazungoo. Still in my battle attire and blood all over me, they looked at me and smiled. The baby was healthy and mom was happy. I would say my day was pretty incredible.

June 9-10 The day I almost died

June 9^th, 2012

Parents I am sorry if you read this post before I talk to you on Skype. Know that I am not an idiot and I am not trying to get killed. I know this probably deserves a verbal explanation but this experience was too good that I had to post it before I lost internet.

Someone is looking after me right now. Matt, Nickles and I decided to go on a safari this weekend. They are college graduates with real jobs, so a seemly responsible group. Friday night we left from Gisyni and took a 3 hour bus ride to Kingali. The only way to get to this Safari in Rwanda is by car, so Matt rented a car. Saturday we left early and literally drove through the jungles of Rwanda with a piece of shit map till we got to Akagera National Park,  the park borders Tanzania. The park rangers said we could drive the safari if we followed the map. They didn’t advise us against it and made it seem like other people did it, so we went for it. We wanted the experience and freedom to do it on our own.  Packed in our RAV4 we took off across the park. Armed with a few knives, map, compass, water, and a half a day’s worth of food we were more than ready to embark on an adventure to find wild giraffes. Driving around we didn’t see anyone, but maybe that why this is considered the best park in Rwanda, so secluded… wrong it had been raining… well torrential downpour the day before. We continued still following the map in search of giraffes. The roads are not kept; you literally just drive around till you find animals.  Keep in mind we are following the “roads” using this provided map. All is going great until we drive into a swamp and we are stuck. One might ask how you end up in a swamp, well we were driving on grass and grass was still ahead but then we suddenly sank. No one around, phones out of range,  water about 3 inches from the bottom of the car, and animals somewhere in the park we are forced with the choice of sitting in a swamp until someone can find us or push the car out. We assess the area and decided to try to push the car out before the car gets flooded. Mud flying and it’s about an hour later, car hasn’t moved. Finally we use some tool in the back of the car to wedge under the tire to try to get some traction. Mud flying still we start to move slowly then the back left tire pops. We tried to change the tire but because we were literally sunk in so much water we couldn’t get the car up high enough to change the tire. This is the point where our safari was no longer fun. I literally thought someone was going to have to find us, we would have to stay the night in our car and hope for the best, or even worse text my parents asking them to send a helicopter to find me in the middle of Africa. Determined and honesty scared for our lives somehow we managed to make it back to a main road, not before we thought we blew the transmission. With the useless map , flat tire, and a compass that didn’t work we somehow managed to find our way. We found the rangers station and OH MY GOD I was never so happy to see other people in my life, I wanted to hug them! They were able to give us a jack that worked and we were able to change the tire. The only advice these ranges offered was don’t worry this kind of thing happens all the time, they have had several people stranded in their cars for days. If it were not for the state of shock I was in I probably would have killed them with my Wal-Mart knife. WHY IN THE WORLD DON’T THEY MARK THE ROADS OR ADVISE PEOPLE NOT TO DRIVE AROUND BY THEMSELVES. WHY DID THEY SAY WE COULD DO IT WITH A MAP!!! How many lost tourist does it take to finally decided that telling people its ok to drive becomes a bad idea? If I was wasn’t at the mercy of these people they would be dead! All three of us looked pathetic, cover in mud, and on the verge of a mental break down. Finally they directed us toward the hotel we had reservations at. From the rangers station and our hotel was about 1km, on the drive finally we spotted the giraffe we had been looking for. Damn thing almost got us killed; I was in no way amused! We made it to the hotel, but as if things couldn’t get any worse they did. They said they had record of our reservations but they had not been paid. We made the reservation, and Matt had paid but what could we do. Covered in mud and Kingali being 3 hours away we paid them for the night. The hotel didn’t take anything but cash so that basically depleted us of all our funds. With barely enough money to eat, and make it back we found a young man that worked at the hotel who could speak English and helped us out. Thank god he was here because he was able to work out a deal with the hotel. That night we all had beds to sleep in, and for the first time in 2 weeks a legitimate shower.

Because we all looked pathetic the park rangers took pity on us, the next day we woke up and they took us on a guided tour… the one they should have offered us in the first place!!!!! We drove around for 5 hours and saw baboons, monkeys, zebras, hippos, warthogs, water buffalo, alligators, and antelope. It was a truly breathe taking experience, so beautiful. We were completely secluded and the only noise you could hear was the sounds of the birds or hippos coming up for air. I loved it but we had certainly worked for this experience. We had to cut the safari short because we had to get back to Kingali. We ended up hiring the same guy that worked at the hotel to escort us back to Kingali so we would get back without any more excitement. Yes we were way in over or heads but don’t think we are idiots. The website, park rangers, and other people made it seem like this was an adventure tourist regularly tackle by themselves. Dad and Patti I know you are probably sitting there thinking why did we send her there? But you know this could have easily happened to us on our McKinnon family vacation, but please know that I am safe, capable of pushing a car out of a swamp and changing a flat tire. Who would have known all the skills I would develop while I am here, I think this an experience we can all learn from. You have raised a very resourceful daughter.

June 8 pics

June 8th

June 8, 2012

This past week has been amazing. I worked three days at the orphanage and two days at the clinic. Already I am starting to get attached to these kids. It’s hard to pick favorites but a couple of them have really stood out. Justin being one of them, Justin is a 14 year old orphan who I brilliant. He is probably the sweetest kid I have ever met. He is very polite and so so so smart. He loves my camera and glasses, so I let him hang on to both while I am there. Most of the pictures on my blog were actually taken by him. I say he’s brilliant because he is amazingly creative, this past week my glasses broke. He tried to give me my broken glasses at the end of the day, I told him he could hang on to them for the night and try to fix them if he wanted. I didn’t expect to see them the next day thinking he would throw them out, but, when I came back Justin had fixed them with a piece of wire he had found on the side of the road... genius. Because I love Justin I have made it my personal goal while I am here to help him with his English, reading, and math skills. The three days I was with him we read a few children’s books, performed basic math, and tried to have conversation both in English and Kinyarwanda. I have also spent some time TRYING to teach a kindergarten class.  Teaching kindergarten is very hard; I almost feel it’s more about containing them than teaching them, so much energy. Finally I resorted to puzzles so they would calm down.

I really enjoyed the orphanage but I don’t know how often I will get to go there since my placement is at the medical center. I do know they have a “clinic” at the orphanage that performs checkups and vaccinations; I might try to do that once a week.

Thursday I started at the clinic, and in a way I already feel like one of the staff members. I was really nervous going my first day because the last time I went there is when I started having trouble breathing. This time I took a bus to the stop off the main road and then hiked into the clinic. It’s probably about a 2.5- 3 miles hike to the clinic from the main road. Once I got there I was immediately put to work. The first day I took several blood samples from patient being tested for HIV, as well as prenatal testing. That was a shocker because the way they take blood here is so old school I have never practice this way. But that didn’t matter; I figured it out and was successful at taking blood from over 20 patients, all of them I got with the first stick… I am VERY proud of myself. The second thing I did was perform prenatal checkups measure the mom’s belly, the baby’s position and how they are developing… keep in mind before Thursday I knew nothing about this. Lastly I went to the maternity ward where the nurse asked if I would be willing to spend the night to deliver babies. That was a surprise, first of all because I am in no way qualified to deliver a child and second I have actually never seen a natural birth. I will have to see how the next week turns out before I start making commitments like that! These people give me too much credit, they think I am way smarter than I really am, already they are calling me Dr. Bre.

June 6-7 pics cont

June 6-7 Pics

June 6-7

June 6, 2012

I am feeling a lot better. I am trying to remain calm and relaxed. The pharmacy here has an injectable medication I could take for asthma but I’m not conformable with the idea of using a needle provided by them, also I don’t know if they regulate their medication, storage, expiration, or if it’s even the medication labeled. I guess I have different expectations coming from the U.S.  Because I didn’t want to stay home alone, and to avoid being around the dust I have decided to go to the orphanage for a couple days. The orphanage is near the hospital in Gisyni and if off of a paved road. It was defiantly an eye opening experience. The conditions in which these children live in is nothing anyone should ever have to experience. I know the orphanage is trying their best, and yes the children do have a place to sleep and some food to eat, but their standard of living is so sad. Is very common to see three or four babies sharing a small crib. Too poor to afford diapers, children are more so than not laying in each other’s urine. The baby room’s reek with stench, and 20 kids often fight over one ratty torn apart baby doll. If a child is lucky enough to have a “diaper” it’s often made of recycled cloth or curtains. There are not even enough bottles for the babies, so some are expected to drink from cups. There is no structure or organized play for the older children. They fight and hit each other for just a chance to play with you. They wear torn up ratty clothing that back in the U.S. would be considered unacceptable to even donate. Toys are non-existent, and for entertainment kids make toys out of trash. Yesterday a child came up to me and asked me if I had a mom. I said my mom had died but I have another mom. They then asked if I had a dad, I told them yes I had a dad. The child responded that I was so lucky to have a mom and a dad, and she wishes she could be me. I wish I could give these children everything, all the love and attention they deserve. I know the time that I spend with them defiantly makes a difference in their life, but what can I do to make more of a lasting impression. What can I do to make a difference? No child should go without diapers, bottle, clothes or toys. The idea of starting some type of fund or collection had crossed my mind several times. It hurts me to think about how much we waste at home. How much clothes or toys we have thrown out just because we consider it old. These kids would cherish something’s we call junk.

June 7^th

I’m feeling better every day. Still the dust and pollution are bothering me but my breathing is improving. Like I said before the idea of starting some type of donation fund has been in the back of my mind. But how can I guarantee that what people donate would be really spent of these children? Since a bank or an ATM is VERY hard to find I don’t think asking for cash is the best way to make a difference now. Long term maybe, but I’m only here till the end of July and I couldn’t guarantee it would get to who it was intended for 100%. The only other option is asking for items that could be sent to Rwanda while I am here, this way I can guarantee that 100% of what people send would go directly toward these orphans. People know that poverty and homelessness exists but sometimes we don’t feel as if we are in a position to actually make a change. It’s easy to see bad things happen on the news but because we are so far away from it we are almost removed, I guess out of sight out of mind. Other times we are hesitant to donate to organizations because we don’t know where our money/item is really going. I have decided now can be your chance to make a difference in someone’s life, even if it’s by donating just a small toy or a bottle. I’m not asking for much but if you could see these kids everyday like I do you would want to do something about it too. So within the next day or so I am going to compile a list of small items that can be donated. It breaks my heart that these children don’t have families but at minimum they deserve to have a toy to play with or a bottle to drink from.

Alright so this is what I have decided. My parents are more than willing to send anything anyone would want to donate to Rwanda.   Based off of what I have seen these items are greatly needed.

Latex gloves

Medical masks

Hand Sanitizer

Plastic bottles

Toys (used or new)

Dolls (used or new)

Marbles

Books (Basic English)

Reusable diapers

Sport balls (basketball, soccer ball)

Clothes (new born to adult, used or new)

Shoes (flip flops, all ages)

Strollers

Sheets

Any education items (flash card, numbers, and alphabet)

Keep in mind no one had to do this, but I am hoping after seeing some of these pictures and reading my blog you will feel more that willing. I am not asking you to go out and buy new things. If you have anything around your house that you are not using please send them to my parents’ house as soon as you can because it will take a couple weeks to get to me. My parents address is McKinnon 11155 Pond Fountain Ct New Market MD 21774. If you live nearby you can drop it off at any time as well. Keep in mind it’s also really expensive to send stuff here so if you would like to donate a couple bucks maybe we can get it here faster. I will take pictures of the kids with your donated items. Also if you would like to call them my house number is 301-882-7195.

June 5th pic

June 3-5

June 3^rd

So it’s very possible I might have an African husband by the time I get back. Besides being called “mazungoo” several people have called me “mwiza”.  Mazungoo I picked up right away. It means white traveler. It’s quite funny actually; people will wave and scream “mazungoo, mazungoo” as I walk down the street. At first I wasn’t sure if it was derogatory, but I have come to learn it’s just what white people are called. Mwiza took me a little longer to figure out since I have not heard it used to attract the attention of a white person. A few women and men have said it to me, and then they just stare. Finally I found someone who could speak enough English to explain it to me, mwiza means beautiful in Kinyarwanda. It’s very flattering, but slightly embarrassing when that’s one of two things people say to you.

People, mostly children will also touch me skin. This I find hilarious! They run up screaming “muzangoo” and then just stop and stare, unsure what to do next. I usually stick out my hand because I have noticed people love to hug or shake hands. At that point they usually understand they have permission to touch me. We shake hands and then they rub my skin. I want to tell them this is the way I was born, and its not getting any darker. They continue to rub my skin as if maybe something darker will appear. Or, maybe they think I have a disease, I don’t know. Mothers will also encourage their children to touch me. I have noticed the younger children will often hide behind their mothers staring at me unsure what to think. It’s funny they are afraid, but I understand, I’m sure it would be pretty scary to see a white person when your entire life you have only seen East Africans. 

In addition to the several interactions I have had with the locals, I also went to explore Kigali a little more. Finally I found some type of shopping, a market. It was outside and had an array of things you could buy. The market sold fruit, meat, vegetables, clothes, and even had a salon. The idea of a salon fascinates me. Both men and women have shaved heads here, why in the world would you need a salon. I walked in interested at what I would find. There were several women sitting around putting weaves in each other’s hair. Fascinated I watched, finally a man came up to me who could speak English and asked me if I wanted a weave.  The idea of braids are tempting but I think I would look a little out of place if had an African weave. He said I would look “mwiza” but I have a feeling dark weaves with my blond highlights would not look so good. I asked him if he could give me one… just to see how it looked. I know I confused him by that comment because he then turned to the women and asked them in “Kinyarwanda”. Once again they all laughed. When did I become such a comedian?

Apparently there is also an African version of the American “catcall”. To get your attention they will make a hissing sound between their teeth until you look their way. Once again I thought it was derogatory but I have come to find out this is how they get each other’s attention.  Everywhere I go I walk down the street and people hiss at me, this is a little hard to get used to.

June 5, 2012

I know this experience is going to be unlike anything I could have ever imagined. Yesterday I arrived in Gisyni. Packed in a van meant for five we squeezed seven of us in, along with our entire luggage, needless to say it wasn’t a very conformable experience. We drove 3 hours up a windy road into the hills of Rwanda, about 1.4km from the DRC. First stop was the children’s orphanage. The orphanage houses over 600 children, ages ranged from 4 days old to 19 years old.  These children come from families who abandoned them, mothers who died during childbirth, parents who were victims of HIV/AIDs, and parents who were killed during the genocide. I wish I had a way with words or some sort of writing talent to describe what I felt. From the second I walked through the gates children clang to me. They would hug me, want to be held, and tell me they loved me. Not one moment throughout the day did I have a free hand.  All staved for love and attention, I had to divide myself among them. Next stop the clinic which I will be working at. To get there we drove through a dirk/rocky path into the middle of nowhere!!!! On the drive dust began to fly everywhere and my chest got tight immediately. When I said I wanted to be placed in a rural area I guess GVN listened. Although my chest was tight we continue to proceed. Once we arrived, I was shocked, for lack of better words. It was completely understaffed; when I stay understaffed I mean there was one nurse running the clinical and a few “nurses” helping the patients.  Completely overwhelmed I took a tour of the clinic.  HIV/AIDS patients lay scattered across the grass, most of them females, victims of sexual abuse. My breathing continued to worsen as I walked through the maternity ward. I walked in and was greeted by a woman who had just given birth to her 7^th child. Not watching where I was walking I stepped in ammonic fluid. When she said she had just given birth, I didn’t realize she had just given birth. We said our goodbyes and made it out of the clinic.  We then drove to our guest house in Gisyni. Because I was having trouble breathing once we got there I went to the pharmacy and hospital looking for asthma medication, which was an experience!  I don’t know if it was the dust, pollution, nearby volcano, or just the stress of seeing people in these conditions that sent me over the edge. Unsure what to do, and still unsure what to do, I had to make the decision to stay in Gisyni or go back to Kingili where there could possibly be a better medical center for me. I was worried because honestly I felt like I had the most medical experience in this town, but I knew though if I could calm myself down my breathing would improve. I called my family, tried to take some deep breaths and came to the decision to stay in Gisyni for now. Gisyni is everything I wanted out of this trip, but in order to stay I need to keep my body and mind together.

June 3

I have had several close encounters with the cockroach that lives in this guest house. First time I found him was in the bathroom, I couldn’t help but scream. I’m sure he was equally startled because he hissed back at me. I’m not sure if that was an English hiss or a KinyaRwandan hiss, regardless we were both speaking the universal language of get away.  Although I don’t like idea of killing animals, I wish I could say that is why I haven’t killed him. But he’s huge, about the size of my thumb, and that would leave a very disgusting mess to clean up… something I’m not prepared to deal with. I’m also trying out my new KinyaRwandan words on the locals, I’m sure I have been providing the local entertainment for the last few days because I am awful. Today I was at store practically playing charades with the clerk when a lady came up to help me. She was very nice and did a great job at trying. When I was about to leave I told her “murakoze”, which means thank you. Not kidding she looked at me and said “what does that mean”, shocked I explained “that’s thank you in your language”. She then starting laughing hysterically at me and then pronounced it the correct way, I guess I really butchered that one… fail.

June 1

Scratch that… Its not called the sunshine hotel nor am I staying there. Ahhh I’m so lost, and it doesn’t really help that none of the streets are marked. All of the streets have names but there are no road signs. To make it even more difficult each street has two names, one which the Belgium’s gave, and the other the Rwandans sometimes use.  The locals I’m sure think I’m an idiot. It probably doesn’t help my case that I can’t speak their language and I’m basically walking around in circles looking for a hotel that doesn’t really exist.

I’m not experiencing the culture shock I had expected. I guess I had this mental image of me backpacking through the jungle with a machete, chased by mountain gorillas, looking for the mud hut I would call home for the next few weeks. I know, so narrow minded, I guess that’s what you get for watching way too much animal planet. However, I was a little surprised when someone told me I can get arrested by walking on the grass. I was also a shocked when Claire told me I would be shot if I came back late and tried to climb over the gait. I guess shoot now, ask questions later. Note to self, don’t walk on the grass and NEVER try to climb a fence. Kigali’s main roads are paved, and are actually pretty clean, still I have yet to find a trashcan anywhere!!! There are no stray animals, or cows running around, certainly a change from India. Peoples driving fall somewhere in between grandma and afraid for my life, so that good too. They honk a lot but I don’t feel like I’m going to die.

The few people I have met so far seem very nice. I only really know Eddie the groundskeeper and Claire my volunteer coordinator. Claire speaks very good English, whereas Eddie speaks none. I have mastered the word hello and thank you, so for right now that is the extent of our communication. I have also met most of the other volunteers, four of us are from the United States, two from Australia, one from Canada, and one from the UK. I think I will be living with a few of them once I get to my placement. The ages of volunteers range from 19 to 49. It certainly a melting point, with the mix of age, religion, and culture.  Length of stay ranges from two weeks, to three months.

Today some of us went into Kigali. There we ate lunch at what I would call a buffet. The food was amazing. Surprisingly meat is widely available and people don’t understand the concept of being a vegetarian, they eat meat when they have it and they eat vegetables when they don’t. Not to worry though, there are a lot of vegetarian options. I also went to exchange some money which is always a challenge the first time. Exchange rate today was 580 Rwandan Francs per one USD. Lastly we went to the Kigali Genocide Memorial. The only thing I can compare it to is the Holocaust museum in DC. The memorial was divided into three sections. The main exhibition tells the history of Rwanda leading up to the genocide through personal testimonies, photographs, and video. The second section called Wasted Lives reflects upon genocides of the past, for example massacres in Armenia, Bosnia, Cambodia, and the Holocaust etc.  Then the third section called Tomorrow Lost was a display of the innocent child victims of the genocide. The memorial without doubt was very somber but in a way I felt like I was an outsider looking in. Watching the videos, and viewing the picture I stood there almost hardened. Of course I understand what happened to these people and how it must be horrific watching your family beaten, rapped, and brutally killed, but there is no possible way I can relate to this. There no experience I have ever had that can even begin to compare to what this entire population has faced. Friends killed friends, family killed family. Innocent people and children were brutally murdered. Horrible, but how can you wrap your mind around something like that. Not until local students came did I really see how this memorial affects the country, and then it began to affect me. When looking at the memorial the students began to cry, hold each other, and fall over with sadness. Students had to be escorted out and held by the staff members. These students couldn’t have been older than 18, few of them, if even any of them were alive to witness these horrific acts of violence. Although it’s so fresh in history I’m still amazed how it effects the younger generations. Another thing I noticed about the students is how they observed each exhibit. As a visitor I stood from a distance looking at the wall of family photos of the people who had been murdered.  As for the students, they walked up close to the photo, sometimes hold them in their hands examining it. I’m not sure, but I think they were looking at family or friends that were killed.  The last display I personally thought was the saddest, it was the child’s exhibit. The exhibit was covered with large picture of children, and under it had a short description of the child. For example one display showed a life sized portrait of a little girl. The description said name: Donata, age: 3 years old, favorite toy: doll, best friend: her daddy, characteristics: very talkative, Death: bludgeoned to death with a club.  There was also a display of skulls, several of them cracked, missing parts or had large bullet sized holes in them. Personally I don’t understand how this country has managed to rise above this. In the memorial today there were Hutu and Tutis crying together, holding each other, grieving as one. How are they able to set aside not only their differences but the fact that they live with the knowledge their neighbor may have killed their entire family. It amazes me how this country has been able to move on and become one, but still remember and memorialize the victims of the genocide.